Feel quite bored today in office so I decided to write something. So I takeout an archived article from my bag and started to copy the article. I crossover an article inside NST on 25 September which I do think that it would be great things to do to put it in my blog. Though it is not suit me or reflect me at the moment, still it can teach us lots of things.
The topic for that article is "Building Relationship that Last".
Trust is an important for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicious, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity, and enmity may result in separation.
NO POINT FINGERS. A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered with a smile, " Never criticise your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband that you."
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point finder to. But if we forgive others, others will ignore our mistakes, too.
CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS? A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage and requested, " I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The officer said, " Your requirement please." The person replied. " Good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable and good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Ready to tell me interesting stories when I need a companion for conversation, and to be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and replied, " I understand, you need television."
Many couples are blind and deaf at courting stage and dream of perpetually perfect relationships. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses.
NO OVERPOWERING. Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all, and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. But usually,this is not he case. There is a Chinese saying that carries the meaning, "It is easier to reshape the mountain or river than a person's character."
It is not easy to change. So having high expectation on changing the spouse's character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness. It would less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectation.
RIGHT SPEECH. There is a Chinese saying that carries the meaning, " A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, they always forget mutual respect and courtesy. They may say anything without consideration if it would hurt the other party.
PERSONAL PERCEPTION. Different people have different perceptions. One man's meat could be another man's poison. You can never have everyone praise your, nor will everyone condemn you, So, do not be too bothered by other's words if you conscience is clear.
BE PATIENT. This is a true story that happened in the US. A man come out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, this three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away and hammered the little's boy hand into a pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery and saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went back home and committed suicide.
Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Too often we fail to recognise the difference between person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. People makes mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.
(p/s: credit to NST and hope somehow we can reflect back on ourselves and thinks whether with our current characteristics, can the relationships sail for a very-very long time?)
Thank you
The topic for that article is "Building Relationship that Last".
Trust is an important for all relationships. When trust is broken, it is the end of relationship. Lack of trust leads to suspicious, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity, and enmity may result in separation.
NO POINT FINGERS. A man asked his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you share with me your secret?" The father-in-law answered with a smile, " Never criticise your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband that you."
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point finder to. But if we forgive others, others will ignore our mistakes, too.
CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS? A person visited the government matchmaker for marriage and requested, " I am looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The officer said, " Your requirement please." The person replied. " Good looking, polite, humorous, sporty, knowledgeable and good in singing and dancing. Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my leisure hour, if I don't go out. Ready to tell me interesting stories when I need a companion for conversation, and to be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened carefully and replied, " I understand, you need television."
Many couples are blind and deaf at courting stage and dream of perpetually perfect relationships. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses.
NO OVERPOWERING. Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all, and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. But usually,this is not he case. There is a Chinese saying that carries the meaning, "It is easier to reshape the mountain or river than a person's character."
It is not easy to change. So having high expectation on changing the spouse's character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness. It would less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectation.
RIGHT SPEECH. There is a Chinese saying that carries the meaning, " A speech will either prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong speech. When a couple is too close with each other, they always forget mutual respect and courtesy. They may say anything without consideration if it would hurt the other party.
PERSONAL PERCEPTION. Different people have different perceptions. One man's meat could be another man's poison. You can never have everyone praise your, nor will everyone condemn you, So, do not be too bothered by other's words if you conscience is clear.
BE PATIENT. This is a true story that happened in the US. A man come out of his home to admire his new truck. To his puzzlement, this three-year-old son was happily hammering dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him away and hammered the little's boy hand into a pulp as punishment. When the father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery and saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, "Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck but when are my fingers going to grow back?" The father went back home and committed suicide.
Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Too often we fail to recognise the difference between person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. People makes mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.
(p/s: credit to NST and hope somehow we can reflect back on ourselves and thinks whether with our current characteristics, can the relationships sail for a very-very long time?)
Thank you
inspiring..! :)
ReplyDeletehihu..tQ2..just a simple post from the newbie...
ReplyDelete